It isn’t too often that I benefit from being mistaken for a man, but today was one!
Given that we didn’t cook enough over the weekend to last us through the week, I had to purchase lunch on campus (but I did bring food for dinner because it’s one of those long days/nights).
Lured by the promise of locally raised turkey, a roasted squash medley, and a baked potato, I went to the student center and stood in line at one of the kiosks.
The server guy glanced up at me and asked, “What can I get for you, sir?” This isn’t surprising since I had a haircut last week, and you know I like my hair super short so that I can’t feel the wind move it.
Not one to dwell on mistakes, I said I wanted the turkey with sides, while the server said, “I’m sorry! I mean ma’am!” To which I replied, “That’s okay. I want the turkey with sides.”
The server couldn’t let the mistake drop, though. Oh no, he had to add, “Well, if you are a man, you’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever seen!”
Okay, first of all, that is simply ridiculous. There are tons upon tons of men more beautiful than me out there. Secondly, I’m not a man.
Which is what I said, “But I’m not a man.”
I just wanted the turkey with sides, not an awkward digression.
Finally the server guy capitulated and said, “Oh, I’ll take care of you.”
I didn’t know what he meant exactly, but I ended up with twice as much turkey as everyone else.
In weighing the benefit of extra turkey versus gender hassling, I think I came out ahead in this situation.
Forks and Needles 
Ha! I love turkey. Maybe I should cut my hair.